谢谢你做我的朋友
Thank you for being a friend.
旅行数日后又重回此处
Traveled down the road and back again.
你的心是如此真诚
Your heart is true.
你是我的贴心好友
You're a pal and a confidante.
若你要开个派对
And if you threw a party.
邀请所有熟人到场
lnvited everyone you knew.
你将发现最好的礼物是我送出的
You would see the biggest gift would be from me.
贺卡上将会写着
And the card attached would say.
感谢你与我为友
“Thank you for being a friend"
黄金女郎 第三季 第七集
翻译：古镇少年
最后 我要感谢今晚的女主人们：
Finally... finally I'd like to thank our hostesses tonight:
桃乐茜
Dorothy,
萝丝和布兰琪
Rose and Blanche.
有她们这样的人支持我
With people like them to support me,
我很自豪能竞选市议员
I am proud just to be running for city councilman.
晚安 记得我的口号
So good night, and remember my slogan:
"吉尔·凯斯勒竞选市议员"
"Gil Kessler for city councilman."
-你把这叫做口号？ -不好意思
- You call that a slogan? - Excuse us.
轻点桃乐茜 要是给我扭坏了就得赔
Easy on the arm, Dorothy. You break it, you pay for it.
妈 你答应过要待在房间里的
Ma. Ma, you promised you'd stay in your room
直到结束
until the meeting was over.
当我是谁 阿福吗？
Who am I, Alf?
《家有阿福》1986-1990 一个外形像猪的外星人 落在一户人家没出过门
-我饿了 -你在暗中观察
- I was hungry. - You were spying.
-那又怎样？他是个懦夫 桃乐茜 -哦妈
- So what? He's a wimp, Dorothy. - Oh, Ma.
告诉你 吉尔·凯斯勒是个非常聪明的人
For your information, Gil Kessler is a very bright man,
一位诚实和忠诚的公民领袖
an honest and devoted civic leader.
可能也是我这辈子见过的最窝囊的人
And probably the biggest wimp I've ever known in my life.
他还有一点我不喜欢
There's something else I don't like about him.
-什么 -我不知道
- What? - I don't know.
这是一种预感 我不确定它是什么
It's a hunch. I can't put my finger on it.
但如果可以的话 我就得把它洗了
But if I could, I would have to wash it.
妈 帮我个忙
Ma, do me one favor.
待在这里直到我们完事
Stay here until we're finished.
真不敢相信你觉得自己的母亲会让你难堪
I can't believe you think your own mother would embarrass you.
不是那样的 妈
It's not that, Ma.
就是这样 妈
It's that, Ma.
好了 我得走了 我妻子出城了
Well, I'd better skedaddle. You know, my wife is out of town.
我要熬到半夜去挑领带袜子
I'm going to be up half the night trying to pick out
和手帕的搭配
a tie-sock-hankie combo.
这就是我最喜欢的
This is just the behind-the-scenes excitement
私底下的活动了
I was hoping to be part of.
-晚安 -晚安吉尔
- Good night. - Good night, Gil.
再见
Bye-bye.
我觉得我们应该感到骄傲
I think we ought to be proud.
我们办了一个很棒的派对
We threw one heck of a party.
你们难道不喜欢参与政治吗?
Didn't you guys just love being involved in politics?
我还没这么开心过呢
Oh, I haven't had this much fun
自从我为杜威竞选工作以来
since I worked on the Dewey campaign.
萝丝 你为托马斯·杜威工作过？
Rose, you worked for Thomas Dewey?
不 是梅尔维尔·杜威 杜威十进制的创始人
No, Melville Dewey. The founder of the Dewey Decimal System.
吉尔·凯斯勒根本没机会赢
You know, Gil Kessler doesn't stand a chance of winning.
-谁说的 -迈阿密邮报
- Who says? - The Miami Post,
迈阿密日报 迈阿密论坛报
the Miami Journal, the Miami tribune,
还有迈阿密自己的报 索菲亚·彼得里洛
and Miami's own, Sophia Petrillo.
妈 他在民调中远远落后
Ma, he's way behind in the polls,
但距离大选还有两天时间 很多事情都有可能发生
but the election is two days away and a lot can happen.
作为其中一员 我会尽我所能
I, for one, am gonna do everything in my power
-让吉尔当选 -行吧
- to get Gil elected. - Fine.
你可以从他留在家里的这个文件夹开始
You can start by taking this folder he left to his house.
另一方面 我为什么要剥夺
On the other hand, why should I deprive Rose
萝丝为我们服务的机会呢?
of a chance to be of service.
好的 但你得洗这些盘子
All right, but you'll have to wash these dishes.
亲爱的 那些盘子都脏了
Honey, those dishes are dirty.
好的 我会把文件夹送过去
Okay, I'll deliver the folder.
为了你真正信仰的事业
I guess there's no sacrifice too great
再大的牺牲也不为过
for a cause you really believe in.
我只希望那个大笨蛋
I just hope that big stupid jerk
能报销我的油钱和里程数
reimburses me for gas and mileage.
真是一个伟大的美国人
There goes a great American.
我把你吵醒了 是吧
I woke you up, didn't I?
我最好有个好理由 是有的
And I better have a good reason. Well, I do.
我对吉尔的竞选有个好主意
I got a great idea for Gil's campaign.
我在做刻有他名字的
I'm making bird feeders with his name on them
喂鸟器
to send around.
你觉得这主意很蠢
And you think that's a dumb idea.
你想把我的喂鸟器拿走
You feel like taking this bird feeder away from me.
然后用锤子砸它
And smashing it with this hammer.
就像这样
Like this.
苍天哪
Holy smoke.
我的天啊
Holy Toledo.
七舅老爷啊
Holy mackerel.
-妈怎么了 -没事
- What, Ma? - Nothing.
怎么了 索菲娅?
What is it, Sophia?
怎么了 萝丝
What, Rose? What?
他们发现吉尔·凯斯勒有外遇
They caught Gil Kessler having an affair.
你开玩笑吧 和谁?
Oh, you're kidding. With whom?
他们不知道她的名字 但是你看
They don't know her name. But look.
他们藏在灌木丛中 在背后拍到了
They hid in the bushes and took this picture of her from behind
她进入他家的照片
going into his house.
我不相信……等一下 看起来像…
I don't believe it... Wait a minute, that looks like...
…布兰琪的红裙子
...Blanche's red dress.
这看起来像布兰琪的红鞋
And those look like Blanche's red shoes.
那不是她的钻石耳环和金手镯吗?
And aren't they her diamond earrings and gold bracelet?
那个小骚货偷了布兰琪的衣服
That little floozy stole Blanche's clothes.
就像阿加莎·克里斯蒂在我们的厨房里
It's like having Agatha Christie right here in our kitchen.
萝丝 布兰琪就是那个小骚货
Rose, Blanche is that little floozy.
-你……你的意思是……-她在50号
- You... You mean... - She's at the 50.
…你觉得她…- 40 30
...you think she... - The 40. The 30.
布兰琪 是你
Blanche, it's you!
你越来越擅长这个了萝丝 那个人是谁?
You're getting so good at that, Rose. Now who's that over there?
我是说这个
No, I mean right here.
我的天
Oh, my God.
我的背影遍布了整个头版
My backside is spread all across the front page.
他们怎么能这么做?
How could they do that?
他们可能用的是广角镜头
They probably used a wide-angle lens.
如果我知道有人在拍我
If I'd known I was being photographed,
我一定会转身面带微笑
I would've turned around and smiled.
听着布兰琪 为了一夜情而毁掉
Listen, Blanche, ruining a man's career for a one night stand
一个人的事业可不是一件小事
is hardly something to make light of.
等一下 你们不会相信这个吧
Oh, now, wait a minute. You girls don't believe this.
我不否认照片里的人是我
I'm not denying that's me in the photograph,
但其它什么事情都没发生啊
but I am denying that anything happened.
我只是把他的文件夹给他了
I just dropped off his folder.
那为什么这里写着你在他家待了两个小时?
Then why does it say here that
you were in his house for two hours?
我们只是在聊天
We were just talking.
那为什么上面写着:“爆炸太大了
Then why does it say, "The explosion was so great,
震碎了隔壁大楼的窗户。"
it shattered windows in the building next door."
萝丝 那是一篇关于危地马拉地震的文章
Rose, that's an article about an earthquake in Guatemala.
姐妹们 我只是把文件夹放下 然后聊了两个小时
Girls, I dropped off the folder, talked for two hours,
帮他挑了领带和手帕的搭配
helped him pick out his tie-sock-hankie combo,
然后就回来啦
and came home.
什么也没发生
Now, nothing else happened.
我发誓
I swear.
好吗
Okay?
-好吧 -好吧
- Okay. - Okay.
我们要怎么帮他摆脱这个烂摊子?
Now, how are we gonna help him get out of this mess?
我应该给报社打电话
I ought to call the newspaper.
等等 我觉得你应该让吉尔自己处理
No, wait, wait. I think you should let Gil handle it himself.
报纸上说他今天下午要开新闻发布会
Oh, the paper says he's having a press conference this afternoon.
我认为在那之前什么都别做
I don't think you should do anything until then.
好吧 我会等的
Okay. Fine, I'll wait.
桃乐茜 看看这张凯斯勒的照片
Look at this picture of Kessler, Dorothy.
那双眼睛背后隐藏着秘密 相信我的直觉
There's a secret behind those eyes. Trust my hunch on this one.
别这样 妈 还记得你对你侄子安吉洛的预感吗?
Oh, come on, Ma. Remember your
hunch about your nephew, Angelo?
-你说过有一天他会成为教皇
- You said one day he'd be Pope.
-桃乐茜 你得注意听啊
- Dorothy, you gotta pay attention.
我说的是有一天 他会卖毒品
I said one day, he'd sell dope.
你觉得他去阿提卡是为了什么 排球项目吗?
What do you think he went to Attica for, the volleyball program?
布鲁诺·博诺菲格里奥
Bruno Bonofiglio.
妈 我睡觉呢
Ma! I was asleep!
我也是 然后我就想到了
So was I. That's when it came to me.
想象一下 西西里岛 1922年
Picture this. Sicily, 1922.
整个村子正处于可怕的葡萄酒危机中
The village is in a terrible wine crisis.
那是葡萄酒的旺季
It's the peak of the wine season.
我们所有踩葡萄的人都被脚气感染了
All our grape stompers are ravaged
by an outbreak of athlete's foot.
很快基安蒂酒就变成了绿色
Soon the Chianti has a green hue
喝起来就像脚癣药膏
and tastes like Desenex.
然后请来了西西里最著名的
They call in Sicily's foremost podiatrist, Bruno Bonofiglio.
足病医生布鲁诺·波诺菲利奥
就是他给墨索里尼提供主要支持的人
He's the one who prescribed arch supports for Mussolini.
欧洲20世纪第一位法西斯独裁者 即将被处决前逃往奥地利 被枪杀后头朝下悬挂在米兰的广场上
墨索里尼被吊起来的时候
Must have really helped his lower back
他肯定了帮了大忙了
when they hung him by his heels.
算了吧 我说的是布鲁诺·波诺菲利奥
Forget him. I'm talking about Bruno Bonofiglio.
我看了他一眼 就预感到他是个麻烦
I take one look at him, and I have a hunch he's trouble.
但是没有人相信我
But nobody believes me.
发生了什么
So, what happens?
他治愈了所有人 葡萄酒销量飙升
He cures everybody and wine sales skyrocket.
等一下 妈
Wait a minute, wait a minute. Ma.
除非我漏掉了什么 否则你的直觉是错的
Unless I'm missing something, your hunch was wrong.
我的直觉从来不会错
My hunches are never wrong.
现在每个人都生活得富足 吃着丰盛的食物
Now, everyone is living high on the hog and eating rich foods.
接下来你就知道了 痛风流行起来了
The next thing you know, there's a gout epidemic.
没有人能踩葡萄了
Nobody can stomp grapes.
布鲁诺靠卖矫形凉鞋大赚一笔
And Bruno makes a killing selling orthopedic sandals.
别告诉我
Don't tell me.
他去了美国 创建了"爽健"
He went to America, and changed his name to Dr. Scholl.
世界足部护理产品第一品牌 1904年创立
事实上 他有恋足癖
No. Actually, he developed a foot fetish
他把自己的头塞进一个女士的橡胶靴里
and suffocated when he shoved his head
窒息死掉了
in a lady's rubber boot.
妈 别再吵醒我了
Ma, don't ever wake me up again.
快 打开电视
Quick. Turn on the television.
吉尔的新闻发布会就要开始了
Gil's press conference is about to start.
天啊 我好紧张 希望他们不要太为难他
Gosh, I'm nervous. I hope they're not too hard on him.
我不太确定 看看那些记者
I wouldn't be too sure. Look at all those reporters.
那是查理·汤普森
Yeah, there's Charlie Thompson.
还有弗雷德·莱昂内和迈克·德夫林
And Fred Leone, and Mike Devlin.
"他打算退出竞选吗?"
Does he plan to withdraw from the race?
我在媒体俱乐部吃过一次午饭
I had lunch at the press club once.
只有一次？
Only once?
天啊，我花了两年才把
Gosh, it took me two years
1977–1981家庭喜剧 主要内容是有8个孩子的家庭
《八岁就够了》里每个人的名字认全
to learn everybody's name on Eight is Enough.
嘘 他要开始了
Hush, hush, he's about to start.
我们马上就知道了
Well, we're about to find out.
候选人和他的竞选经理来了
Here comes the candidate and his campaign manager now.
下午好
Good afternoon.
我是来回应媒体猜测
I'm here to respond to the media speculation
有关于我和一个身份不明的女人有染
that I am having an affair with an unidentified woman.
在我的职业生涯中
I have been the subject of many scurrilous,
我一直是诽谤和恶意谣言的对象
slanderous and downright malicious rumors in my career.
但这个谣言是最糟糕的谣言
But this rumor is the worst kind of rumor.
因为这就是事实
This is a true rumor.
就像你们说的那样
It actually happened Just like you said.
对我来说不是
Well, not with me, it didn't.
凯斯勒先生 那个女人是谁?
Mr. Kessler, who was the woman?
无论如何我都不能透露她的身份
I can't reveal her identity under any circumstances.
独家消息来源确认了她的身份
Independent sources identified her
她是布兰琪·德弗罗
as Blanche Devereaux.
哦 从哪得到的?
Oh, please. What sources?
抱歉 布兰琪
Sorry, Blanche.
不敢相信
I don't believe this.
他撒谎了
He just lied.
桃乐茜 他
Dorothy, he...
萝丝？你们不相信我吗?
Rose? Well, don't you girls believe me?
索菲亚？
Sophia?
我绝对相信你 布兰琪
I believe you, Blanche. Absolutely.
我需要《人物》杂志的号码
Hello? I need a number for People magazine.
就那个部门会买政客和
The department that buys stories about politicians
下流女人上床的报道
who sleep with sleazy broads.
别担心 不是关于你的
Don't worry, it's not about you.
桃乐茜 萝丝？
Dorothy, Rose?
跟我说说话啊
Talk to me.
你们得相信我
You girls have got to believe me.
我们曾经相信过你布兰琪 但我们不会再上当了
We believed you once, Blanche. We're not falling for it again.
上什么当?我说的是实话
Falling for what? I told you the truth.
别闹了 你真的指望我们相信
Come off it. You really expect us to believe
吉尔在电视上当着一百万人的面撒谎？
that Gil was lying on television in front of a million people?
人们在电视上撒谎 桃乐茜
People lie on television, Dorothy.
他们在《60分钟》里一直这么做
They do it on 60 Minutes all the time.
他是个参加竞选的已婚男人
He's a married man running for election.
如果都没有 他为什么要说自己有外遇?
Why would he say he had an affair if he hadn't?
我不知道
I'm sure I don't know.
我也不明白你为什么就认为我有罪
And I also don't know why you just assume I'm guilty.
你能给我一个对你撒谎的理由吗?
Can you give me one good reason why I would lie to you?
你觉得尴尬是因为你勾引了他
You're embarrassed because you seduced him.
你又害怕又内疚，因为你毁了他的竞选
You're scared and guilty because you've ruined his campaign.
有三个很好的理由
Three good reasons.
-闭嘴萝丝 -闭嘴萝丝
- Oh, shut up, Rose. - Oh, shut up, Rose.
你好 是的 我是布兰琪·德弗罗
Hello. Yes, this is Blanche Devereaux.
是的 那个布兰琪·德弗罗
Yes, that Blanche Devereaux.
不 我没有 绝对不是
And no, I did not. Absolutely not.
我会告诉法官的
I will tell it to a judge,
我要在最高的山上大喊
I will yell it from the highest mountain,
我还会对着《圣经》发誓
I will swear to it on a stack of Bibles.
这听起来像骗子吗?
Now, did that sound like a liar?
听起来就像《晚间新闻》里吉姆和塔米·菲伊
No. It sounded like Jim and Tammy Faye on Nightline.
你好？
Hello?
是的 我是布兰琪你怎么知道这个号码的?
Yes, this is Blanche, and how did you get this number?
我为什么要跟你说话?
Better yet, why am I even talking to you?
我不喜欢你 事实上 我恨你
I don't like you. Matter of fact, I hate you.
你可以把我的电话撕了
You can just tear up my number
然后爬回你那假惺惺的面具底下
and go climb back under your slimy rock
和你其他的狐朋狗友呆在一起
with all the rest of your slimy friends.
别再给我打电话了
And don't you ever call here again.
桃乐茜 记着回电话给斯坦
Dorothy, call Stan.
布兰琪 你为什么不承认你做了什么
Blanche, why don't you admit what you did.
你犯了一个错误
You made a mistake.
你按自己的方式做了事 现在你要为此付出代价
You live your life a certain way and now you're paying for it.
你因为我的过去就认定我有罪
You are assuming that I'm guilty because of my past.
这是不公平的
Well, that is not fair.
姑娘们 我有麻烦了
Listen, girls, I'm in trouble here.
这不再好笑了
Now, this isn't funny anymore.
你是对的 这一点都不好笑 这是可悲的
You're right. This is not funny. It is sad.
你不能来告诉我们真相
You couldn't come to us and tell us the truth.
你还是不能
And you still can't.
别这样对我
Don't do this to me.
你们是我最好的朋友
You're my two best friends.
我们怎么知道你说的是实话?
How do we know you're telling the truth about that?
我猜你没办法知道了
Well, I guess you don't.
对不起 小姐 你不能进去
Excuse me, Miss. You can't go in there.
我凭什么不能
Oh, the hell I can't.
我应该把你踢到塔拉哈西去
I ought to kick your butt to Tallahassee.
-对不起布兰琪 -你对…
- I'm sorry, Blanche. - You're sor...
有记者缠着你吗?
Do you have reporters badgering you?
你有室友叫你骗子吗?
Do you have roommates calling you a liar?
你才是那个该死的骗子
You are the damn liar.
就算你是世上最后一个男人 我也不会跟你上床
I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man in Creation.
你为什么要撒谎？
Now, why did you lie?
-嗯，原因是… -为什么?
- Well, the reason is... - Why?
…我只是想… -为什么?
...I was trying... - Why?
从来都没人听我说话
Nobody ever listens to me.
别发牢骚了 你这胆小鬼 告诉我你为什么撒谎
Quit whining, you wimp, and tell me why you lied.
这就是原因 从来没人听我讲话
That is the reason. Nobody ever listens to me.
他们从来没有 就像你说的 我就是个懦夫
They never have. I'm a wimp, just like you said.
至少在今天之前是这样
At least I was until today.
当报纸刊登我出轨的报道时
When the newspaper printed that story about my having an affair,
人们不再认为我是个窝囊废 开始关注我
people stopped thinking I was a wimp and started listening.
我不能告诉他们这是个错误
I couldn't tell them it was a mistake.
你是想告诉我人们现在更喜欢你了吗
Are you trying to tell me that people like you better now
因为他们觉得你和一个美女上床了?
because they think you went to bed with a gorgeous woman?
来 你自己看看 这是今天的投票情况
Here, see for yourself. This is today's poll.
布兰琪 我从没想过他们
Blanche, I never expected that they would figure out
会发现照片里的人是你
it was you in that picture.
当他们这么做的时候 我感觉很不好
I felt terrible when they did.
那你觉得我是什么感觉?
Well, how do you think I feel?
人们认为我和你上床了
People think I slept with you.
布兰琪..
Blanche...
…在我的一生中 人们总是忽视我
...all my life, people have looked right past me.
在我成长的过程中
You know, when I was growing up,
每年回到学校的第一天
the first day back at school every year,
一半的孩子都以为我是新来的
half the other kids always thought I was new in town.
我不得不拿出年鉴来证明他们是错的
I had to bring in a yearbook to prove that they were wrong.
但尽管如此 我总觉得
But all the same, I always felt
在我的内心深处 还是很有抱负的
that deep inside me was a great man trying to get out.
所以我进入了政界
So I went into politics.
而人们却一直无视我这伟大的抱负
And people kept looking right past that great man.
直到今天
Until today.
布兰琪 虽然听起来很疯狂 但我真的有机会赢
Blanche, as crazy as it sounds, I've got a real chance to win.
因为你撒谎了
Because you lied.
所以要付出这么高的代价？
Is that such a high price?
吉尔 我不太懂政治
Oh, Gil, I don't know much about politics,
但我对男人还是略知一二的
but I do know a thing or two about men.
我知道你是什么样的人
And I know what kind of man you are.
你是个诚实的人
You're an honest man.
这就是为什么我们都相信你
That's why we all believed in you.
现在你开始撒谎 跟其他政客一样
Now you started lying and you're just like other politicians.
不诚实
Dishonest.
即使你赢得了这次选举 那也不意味着什么
If you even win this election, it won't mean a hill of beans.
因为不是你实实在在去赢得的
'Cause it won't be you winning.
不做一个诚实的人 你永远不会成为一个伟大的人
You'll never be a great man, without being an honest man.
你想想吧
You think about that.
好兴奋噢
This is exciting.
想想看 不到24小时
Just think, in less than 24 hours,
吉尔·凯斯勒可能会成为市议员
Gil Kessler could be city councilman.
我很高兴 萝丝 但不管发生什么
I'd love to get excited, Rose, but no matter what happens,
我都得处理掉那个撒尿天使的潘趣酒碗了
I'm gonna get stuck cleaning out that peeing-angel punch bowl.
桃乐茜 我和凯斯勒聊过了
Dorothy, I've been chatting with your boy, Kessler.
再给我一个小时 我就能搞清楚他的秘密
Give me another hour, I'll have his secret figured out.
什么秘密
What secret?
你耳朵里有奶酪吗?我说再给我一个小时
You got cheese in your ears? I said give me another hour.
离我远点 你们这些警犬
Get away from me, you bloodhounds.
我跟你们没什么好说的 除了这个:
I have nothing to say to you. Except this:
从现在起 只要我的名字出现在报纸上
From now on, when my name appears in print,
最好写上布兰琪·德弗罗 逗号 39岁
it better read Blanche Devereaux, comma, 39.
她今晚还真有脸来这里
Well, she has a lot of nerve showing up here tonight.
我们尽量客气点 萝丝
Let's try to be polite, Rose.
好吧
Okay.
嗨 布兰琪
Hi, Blanche.
布兰琪 我跟你打了招呼
Blanche, I said hello.
我一般不和那些叫我骗子的人说话
I don't normally speak to people who call me a liar.
听着 布兰琪 我们现在是在公共场合
Now look, Blanche, we're in public now.
没有理由怀有敌意啊
There's no reason to be hostile.
当然有了 我不喜欢你
Oh, yes, there is. I don't like you.
横条纹会让你看起来像罗杰·艾伯特
And horizontal stripes make you look like Roger Ebert.
你真的想在这咱们骂起来吗？
Do you really want to put this on a level of name calling?
-好啊 -那来吧
- Yes. - So do I.
-叛徒 背后捅刀子的 -荡妇 破坏家庭的贱人
- Traitor. Back stabber. - Tramp. Home wrecker.
送了礼又收回去的人
Indian giver.
对不起 我只是冲动了
I'm sorry, I just got caught up in the moment.
女士们先生们
Ladies and gentlemen.
请大家注意
If I could have your attention,
我有几句话想说
I have a few words I'd like to say.
首先 我要感谢你们所有人
First off, I want to thank all of you.
这是一场很棒的竞选
This has been a great campaign.
明天的这个时候 我可能就成为大家的议员了
Tomorrow at this time, I could actually be your councilman.
但我不想成为市议员
But I don't want to be your city councilman
除非我能光明正大地赢得这份工作
unless I can win this job honestly,
而有些事我一直没说实话
and there is something that I have not been honest about.
布兰琪·德弗罗和我从未有过婚外情
Blanche Devereaux and I never had an affair.
我这么说只是为了改善我的形象
I only said that to improve my image.
哈哈
Ha, ha, ha.
布兰琪是个好人 不能这样利用她
Blanche is too good a person to be used that way.
事实上 她让我意识到诚实是多么重要
In fact, she made me realize how important honesty is.
这就是为什么我要实话告诉大家
That's why I'm going to be honest about something else.
我其实不是大家想的那样
I'm not who you think I am.
1968年 我做了一次整容手术
In 1968, I had an operation.
在那之前 我是一个兼职速记员
Until that time, I lived life as part-time stenographer
和一位随和的家庭主妇一起生活
and mild-mannered housewife, Anna-Maria Bonnaduci.
什么？
What?
真不敢相信
I can't believe it.
你觉得我的直觉怎么样 桃乐茜
What do you say about my hunches now, Dorothy?
再给我五分钟 我就能证明了
Five more minutes, I would have had it.
妈 你怎么知道的?
Ma, how could you know?
没人知道啊
No one knew.
拜托 看看他的鼻子 他当然是意大利人
Please, look at his nose, of course he's Italian.
我还是不明白吉尔·凯斯勒做的那个手术
I'm still confused about the operation Gil Kessler had.
这个人在过程中睡着了吗?
Is the man asleep during it?
我想是的 萝丝
I think so, Rose.
那他们放上的零件呢?
And what about the parts they put on?
他们会先测试吗?
Do they test them first?
当然 萝丝 就像雨刷一样
Of course, Rose, you know, like windshield wipers.
-所以起作用了 -我想是的
- So they work. - I assume so, yes.
它们是用什么做的?
What are they made of?
橡皮泥 萝丝
Silly putty, Rose.
我不知道 萝丝
I don't know. I don't know, Rose.
我只想忘记整件事
I just want to forget the whole incident.
这是个糟糕的夜晚 我心情很不好
It's been a terrible night and I am very upset.
因为吉尔退出了竞选
Because Gil dropped out of the election
而布兰琪讨厌我们
and Blanche hates us.
我不高兴是因为他们没有重播
I'm upset because they haven't re-run
《澳大利亚生活的真相》
the Facts of Life Goes to Australia.
改自The Facts of Life Down Under 《生活的真相》（1987 )
如果布兰琪
I wouldn't be surprised
再也不和我们说话 我觉得也正常
if Blanche never speaks to us again.
她完全有理由不搭理我们
She'd certainly have every reason not to.
我们做了件可怕的事 不相信她
We did a terrible thing, not believing her.
我们还是习惯这个事实吧
We might as well get used to the fact
她会很长很长时间生我们的气
that she's gonna be mad at us for a long, long time.
嗨姐妹们 你们怎么样?
Hi, girls. How ya'll doing?
为什么 布兰琪 你不生气吗?
Why, Blanche, aren't you mad?
不会了
Not anymore.
但我们做了这么糟糕的事
But we did a terrible thing.
你应该一直生我们的气
You should stay mad at us for a long, long time.
你应该让我们卑躬屈膝
You should make us grovel,
含垢忍辱 乞求宽恕 沉默的对待我们
eat dirt, beg for forgiveness, give us the silent treatment.
萝丝 如果你对我们不理不睬 我宁愿吃土
Rose, if you give us the silent treatment, I will eat dirt.
我没法一直生你们的气 知道吗?
I couldn't stay mad at you girls, you know?
我想了想 我意识到
I did some thinking and I realized
这一切都是我的错 和你们一样
I was as much to blame for all this as you all were.
-如何? -说得太多了
- How? - By talking so much.
如你所知，我经常谈论我的男人们
As you know, I've always talked a lot about my men.
有时候我把事实夸大了一点
And sometimes I've stretched the truth just a little.
这是南方古老的传统
It's an old Southern tradition, storytelling.
不能仅仅因为你没有过的开心
Just because you didn't have a good time
就用一个无聊的故事来烦你的朋友
there's no reason to bore your friends with a dull story.
所以就修饰它 加一点阴影 一点颜色
So you embellish it, you add a little shading, a little color,
再来点劲爆的
a little hot tub.
我想我终于醒悟了
I guess it finally caught up with me.
但我觉得我已经吸取了教训
But I do think I've learned my lesson.
我们能拥抱一下 忘记这一切吗?
Can we have a hug and forget this ever happened?
当然可以
You bet we can.
过来 你们两个
Come here, you two.
我很高兴我们又成了朋友
Oh, I'm glad we're friends again.
我也是
Oh, me too.
布兰琪 既然你说了实话
Listen, Blanche, now that we have you telling the truth,
你能告诉我们鲍勃·弗雷德里克斯的真相吗
Would you tell us the truth about, um, Bob Fredericks.
真的 千真万确
True, absolutely true.
霍华德·阿瑟怎么样?
How about Howard Asher?
也是真的
True.
埃里克·默多克
Eric Murdock.
真的 真的
True, true.
他有双胞胎兄弟
He had a twin brother.
我会对我最好朋友撒谎吗?
Would I lie to my two best friends?
在身后比出这个手势 表示其实是说谎 在祈求自己不要因为撒谎而收到惩罚
翻译：古镇少年